Apples & Alexander
by Selene la Luna
Summary: Lex doesn't like apples but he loves Hephaestion. Part of the CLex Fuh-Q-Fest Second Wave.


**Title**: Apples & Alexander  
**Author**: Selene la Luna  
**Email**: darkmooneternal23@comcast.net  
**Fandom**: Smallville   
**Category**: Sap, Fluff, Romance, Established Relationship  
**Disclaimer**: All recognizable characters belong to a bunch of people who aren't me. I'm just a fan, who in no way claims to own any of it, so don't sue.  
**Distribution**: My site -- forsaken-faith.net, Clex Fuh-Q Fest Archive. Anyone else, ask and ye shall receive.  
**Rating**: PG  
**Spoilers**: General Season 1  
**Summary**: Lex doesn't like apples but he loves Hephaestion.  
**Challenge**: Clark's parents have to go away for a week for some reason, and they ask Lex to look out for Clark during that time. Lex helps out on the farm. Why? (kira-nerys)  
**Author's Notes**: Part of the Second Wave of the Clex Fuh-Q Fest at www.kardasi.com  
**Author's Notes 2: **I referenced _The Princess Bride_ at the end of this without even realizing it until I re-read it. Just goes to show how much I love it, I guess. And much thanks to Christine for the beta. 

******** 

Lex could now say he officially hated apples. They were far too heavy and... well, he just didn't like them. With a final glare at the basket full of the juicy red fruits he'd just placed in the back of the truck, he turned and headed back for the house. 

He was absolutely going to kill Clark for talking him into this. A whole Saturday in which they could be doing so many much more... interesting things, and here he was stuck lugging around produce. He, Lex Luthor, was doing manual labor! The very idea was utterly ridiculous. If that wasn't enough, his new black designer jeans were completely ruined, covered in dust and other various grime. His shirt would be likewise ruined if it weren't for the fact Clark had loaned him one of his flannels. Lex sighed to himself. If his father could see him now, he'd never live it down. 

Did he mention he was going to kill Clark? 

This thought in mind, he opened the screen door to enter the kitchen. Upon entering however, he decided to reevaluate his plans. Even as he stepped in the door a rush of warm air hit him in the face. Several freshly baked apple pies sat on the table, steam rising gently off of them as they cooled. The counters were covered with flour and other assorted baking products, giving the room the look of a disaster area. That wasn't what caught Lex's attention, though. 

Clark, teen alien and his lover of over a year, stood amidst the chaos that was once Mrs. Kent's kitchen. Leaning against a counter and stirring something in a ceramic bowl with concentration etched on his face, Clark looked amazingly cute. His clothes were disheveled, both the blue flannel shirt and worn blue jeans covered in flour and... was that egg? Lex was pretty sure it was. He had more flour laced throughout his rumpled dark hair and on his cheeks, which were flushed pink from the heat that filled the room. His eyebrows were drawn together and a small bit of his tongue was peeking out of the corner of his mouth, which led Lex's thoughts in a direction he'd be better off getting away from. Besides, hadn't he been mad at his lover when he'd entered? If there was one thing Lex hated more than apples at the moment, it was the fact he simply couldn't stay angry with Clark for more then two minutes. 

"Clark," Lex called to get the young man's attention once it was obvious Clark hadn't heard him come in. 

Clark looked up from his stirring long enough to give Lex a warm smile before turning back to his work. Seeing Clark was more interested in stirring then him made Lex a little annoyed. So he calmly walked over to Clark, took the bowl out of his hands, and took him into his arms, ignoring the flour covering him. Clark's curious look made Lex smirk before he quickly reached up to give the boy a kiss that made both of them much hotter then the heat from the oven was able to. 

When they finally pulled apart they were both panting lightly, and Clark was grinning down at him. "What was that for?" 

"That, Clark, was for ignoring me," Lex told him haughtily. 

"Well, then," Clark replied smugly, "I should do it more often." 

Lex mock glared at him. "Don't even think about it." 

Clark rolled his eyes as he turned back to his bowl. "As if anyone, let alone me, could ignore you." 

With an indignant huff Lex threw himself into one of the chairs at the kitchen table, somehow managing to look as if he owned the place and the neighboring cities while covered in sweat, dirt and flour. Clark had no idea how he did it, but it certainly was a very 'Lex' thing to do. 

"Have you finished loading up the truck?" Clark asked suddenly. 

Lex, startled from his attempt to get a cookie, nearly dropped the heavy glass jar they were stored in. His own fast reflexes saved it before it hit the ground, but he noticed Clark tense just in case he was too slow. After carefully setting the jar back in the center of the table, two cookies short, Lex turned back to answer Clark's question. 

He bowed from his sitting position with a flourish. "Yes, master. I have completed your task. What more do you wish of me?" He fluttered his eyelashes adoringly. 

Clark burst out laughing at his performance, exactly what he'd been going for. If Clark's famous grin was breathtaking, his laugh was intoxicating. When he'd calmed down enough to speak, he gave Lex a mischievous half smirk. "I'd love to take you up on your offer, but anything else I wish of you would best be served in the castle behind locked doors with lots of lube." 

Noticing the dark glint enter Lex's eyes Clark was quick to add, "But we can't do anything like that until we're done with this." 

A small pout on his lips Lex asked, "What's the point in your parents going away for a week if we can't take advantage of the opportunity to be alone without me worrying about your father's shotgun?" 

"Lex, I've told you this before. My dad won't go after you with a shotgun," Clark said honestly. "He'll come after you with a pair of rusty pruning shears." 

The billionaire winced, unconsciously crossing his legs, which did not go unnoticed by Clark. With a grin the boy went on, "Anyway, my parents didn't go away so you could spend the time divesting me of my innocence and virtue. They went to a farming convention in Utah." 

Lex snorted. "Innocence and virtue? Clark, I hate to break it to you, but you have been neither innocent nor virtuous since the first week of us being lovers." 

Clark shrugged indifferently. "That's beside the point. My parents don't know that little detail, and unless you'd like to be arrested they won't know until after my birthday." 

"Case and point," Lex agreed reluctantly. 

"And as for your complaint about today, I'd like to remind you once again that my parents are gone for a week. An entire week, Lex, without parental supervision. That means no wondering if my dad is going to walk into the barn and see us making out, no worrying about getting caught sneaking into the barn at five in the morning, and none of that other fun stuff we usually have to deal with. All they asked was that we do this one little thing, and they even gave me permission to stay at the castle," Clark reminded. 

Giving a little sigh Lex said, "I suppose it is for the greater good. You still owe me for this, Clark." 

With a smile Clark replied, "I doubt I'll have too much trouble making it up to you. You know, I've always loved that pool table of yours. We should make more use of it." 

Easily seeing what Clark was suggesting Lex smirked. "Really? There won't me much use gotten out of it if you break it, dearest." 

"True," Clark granted with a nod. "You'll just have to be on top then." 

"A hardship really, but I do what I must," Lex told him playfully. 

"Yes, and right now you _must_ deliver those apples before it gets dark. Keys are in the glove compartment," Clark offered. 

With another long suffering sigh Lex got up and headed for the door. "I expect you to be done with your little bakery when I get back, lover. Then those pies are going straight to the Talon, and we're going home." 

"As you wish, Alexander," his lover said warmly. 

"Always, Hephaestion," Lex returned with a half smile before exiting the kitchen. He had deliveries to make after all. 

As he pulled out of the drive, glancing once more toward the cheery farmhouse, Lex wondered if Alexander the Great was wrapped around his Hephaestion's finger as much as he was. If he was anything like Clark, Lex decided, it was absolutely certain. 

fin 


End file.
